- Do not believe me, that I was so drunk ...
- Brother, after Metro announced that the station is, you sat on your knees and you've said that you spoke passengers God.
Miss, I smile whenever I feel like I invite you to me.
- Oh, you are a seductive!
- Does Not. I am the dentist!
A very elegant restaurant. One of the customers and napkin tied around his neck. The room called the waiter and says:
- Attract them, please, polite attention, that is not common here that!
The waiter goes to the client and asks friendly:
- What you want, shave or haircut?
Do You Smoke?
- Does Not.
- Bei?
- Does Not.
- Adultery?
- Does Not.
- Do not cheat your wife?
- Does Not.
- Then how sin?
- I Lie.
Mom, why my cousin her name is Rose?
- Because your aunt likes flowers.
- And you, what you like ?!
- Dicky, I do not ask so many questions!
New glasses make you look better.
- But I have new glasses ...
- I have!
I decided, divorce my husband ...
- How so?
- Every night I dream that I'm cheating with blonde scale the three ...
- Well divorce because of dreams?
- If my dreams do that, you realize in's ???
People-divides into three main categories: Those who can count and those who can not.
When I woke up I was in hospital. Doctors told me that I was assaulted by a woman. Then I remembered.
I was in the elevator and I looked sideways at her breasts when suddenly a lady said to me:
"Press 1".
Two hunters are lurking in the bushes when one passes over them 'with a hang glider.
Hunters are not the thoughts lead to eye and shoot guns.
- What was drăcovenia this?
- Any eagle something ... No good that gave the roads' man ...
World Congress of women, they decided to seek equal rights and obligations at home with their husbands. After six months:
Englishwoman: - I told John to draw ...
- And you saw something?
- The first day there, but then took the children to the theater, gathered leaves on the porch ...
- And you saw something?
- The first day there, but then began to read stories to children, took them to the park ...
Romance - I said Vasile equal ...
- And you saw something?
- First days really do not, but then I began to see, but just on the wrong foot ...
We worst of how many vet. My horse broke a leg and the doctor told me to shoot him. What I did. But do not heal people. Now struggling poor thing worse that has a broken leg and a nasty wound from gunshot ...
Two guys in a bar hanging. The first instructs the other:
- Women love compliments and sense of humor!
Hearing this type of approach a lady and says:
-Wow, You are so beautiful! Just kidding, just kidding ...
Before leaving, I told my son 10 years:
- Watch out, to go home to 12, we agreed?
- Yes, he replied.
When they returned, I shouted at him, desperate:
- Where the hell have you been two years ?!
So loud neighbor who scared me yelling at her kid to clean that I made myself!
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HAVE A NICE DAY !
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